Senioritis Guide for Teachers

Danielle MacArt, Reporter

It’s second semester of our senior year. Whoever thought that our senioritis would get this bad? As we approach graduation, our senioritis gradually becomes worse. OK, maybe not gradually. Rapidly is probably more accurate.
Every day is a struggle to walk up the stairs to class, to turn in our homework and to quickly switch pages on our iPad so our teacher doesn’t catch us checking Instagram for the thousandth time. We just don’t care anymore. Teachers say they understand, but we can’t see how when they keep on piling on homework, projects and tests. Well, listen up teachers! If you would really like to help us, take advice from this guide on senioritis, which was made just for you.

1. If we say we just can’t even, we really just can’t even. Understand that most likely this will be applied to the CRP, and although we will get it done, it probably won’t be anything spectacular. Don’t expect too much from us.
2. Please give us extensions for our CRP if we ask for one. We probably still won’t do it until the night before it’s due, but giving us an extra week allows us to catch up on much needed things, like sleep (or Netflix).
3. If we fall asleep in your class, please don’t take it the wrong way. It’s not you, it’s us. We’re just trying to make up for all the sleep we’ve lost during the past four years.
4. If we’re late to class, please don’t sigh in exasperation. Be happy that we took the time and effort to actually show up when it’s 75 degrees outside and totally beach weather.
5. Don’t give us a UV unless we’re wearing some outrageous color with our uniform, like red or pink. It was a struggle to even put on a shirt this morning, let alone one that is uniform-approved. Don’t ask about the bra.
6. Also understand that we will wear yoga pants, no matter how many UVs we get. So save us both time and just let it slide.
7. When you see us shopping for dresses online, please don’t get mad at us. Getting a prom dress is really stressful, and needing five other dresses for May doesn’t help our stress levels either.
8. We’re really sorry for our very less-than-perfect homework. But hey, we actually turned it in and did it (at least some of it). Praise for making some kind of effort on it is always welcome. Maybe you could get an Adequate stamp just for us.
9. Finally, our laziness cannot be helped. That’s why we only got to nine on this list–ten just wasn’t an option. Think of it like a disease and take pity on us. Would you be irritated at a student for getting the flu? No, you would not.

From here on out, we will continually get more lazy, but it’s a symptom, one that can only be cured by less work. If possible, we would love to not do any work. This is a mutually beneficial idea because then you wouldn’t have to grade as many assignments, thus having more time to spend with family and friends. If every teacher adopted this policy, senioritis would be eradicated forever.

At the end of the day, we just want to go home, lie on our bed, and cross off today’s date on our countdown-to-graduation calendar that we made last year. This is about all we have the effort to do when we get home after a very long day at school. All we’re asking is that our lives be made easier so we are able to walk (or lightly jog in heels) to graduation in one piece.