Netflix Psychoanalysis: Mary Jane Perryman


Bella Anderson Enni, Reporter

We all know Señora Perryman as the comical yet brilliant advanced Spanish teacher who seems to never leave her little home in Room 21.  In fact, she can even be found eating International Club’s leftover food from the mini fridge and watching Netflix during lunch hours and later hours.  But there is something quite peculiar about these shows that fulfill her late night television binging. The Voice takes a deeper look into Señora’s “Recently Watched” Netflix queue in an attempt to answer, “Who really is Mary Jane Perryman?”

Contrary to popular belief, the show Perryman most recently enjoyed is not Abismo de Pasion or Como Agua Para Chocolate but rather the English historical fiction television series, The Tudors.  Based on the reign of King Henry VIII of England, this Showtime favorite details all of the familial ties, political dealings and brutal assassinations that occurred during 16th century England.  In this case, I believe the answer is quite clear; Señora Perryman’s true desire is to become an English teacher.  Where better to learn proper English than directly from the source?   She is starting from the beginning, early in history, in order to gain all the information necessary to properly educate young minds about the country of England and their wonderful language.      

Our illusion of Mary Jane Perryman is once again shattered by the revelation of her second favorite show, House of Cards.  Curiously, the main character, Congressman Frank Underwood, is seeking to become Secretary of State through an elaborate, ruthless and manipulative plan.  It is possible this political drama holds all the clues Perryman needs to obtain the next step in her career.  Even though she’s chair of  the modern language department, who knows? Maybe Perryman is gathering information to give Miller a run for her money.

The third series on Perryman’s most recently watched queue is the popular Orange is the New Black.  We all know that our beloved Spanish teacher enjoys an adventure.  But perhaps she was an accomplice in a bank robbery in her youth and simply wants to see what life is like in a women’s federal prison in case her deeds come to light.  After all, couldn’t you picture her rocking the orange jump suit and stylish red do?

The final show on the list is ABC’s political thriller Scandal.  Have you heard of any scandalous goings-on within the Presentation administration?  Probably not  because Perryman is clearly practicing her crisis management by channeling her inner Olivia Pope.  She is single-handedly protecting the reputations of Presentation’s elite and keeping the peace on campus.

All in all, we now see that Mary Jane Perryman is a woman of many dimensions who has a fascination with the inner workings of the governmental institutions.  Whether simply for entertainment or for her own personal inquiry, we may never know.