How To (not) Write Your CRP

Rachel Stanley, Reporter

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Step 1: Don’t check your calendar for deadlines. As we know, that causes stress, and that is something we most definitely want to avoid.

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Step 2: Watch some Netflix, browse Tumblr, check your Facebook or Instagram. I mean, it’s technically research, isn’t it? Kind of?

 

 

 

Step 3: Forget about the paper altogether. It’s probably been causing you some subconscious stress, so it’s for the best.

 

 

 

Step 4: A few weeks later, allow yourself to remember your paper. Now that you have psychologically prepared yourself through the art of procrastination, you should probably check that deadline.

 

 

 

Step 5: Discover that your paper is due tomorrow.

 

 

 

Step 6: Allow the panic to sink in.

 

 

Step 7: Cry.

 

 

 

Step 8: Cry some more.

 

 

 

Step 9: Drink a lot of caffeine.

 

 

 

Step 10: Feverishly crank out a twelve paged paper with excellent sources – Wikipedia counts, right? – and artfully phrased topic sentences.

 

 

 

Step 11: Go to bed at some point in the early morning and catch an hour of sleep.

 

 

 

Step 12: Turn your paper in the next morning, riddled with coffee stains and misspelled words.

 

 

 

Step 13: Finally, complain incessantly about how CRPs require way too much work and how unreasonable teachers’ deadlines are. How on earth are you supposed to get everything done on time anyways?

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