Dear Nano

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Dear Nano

Presentation High School

Presentation High School

Presentation High School

Sangeet Brar, Reporter

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Dear Nano,

Christmas is almost here and I still don’t know what to get my boyfriend. He doesn’t like any of the presents I ever get him, so what do I do this time?

Thanks,

Presents Problem Polly

 

Dear Presents Problem Polly,

Christmas is Christ’s day of birth, why are you buying presents for some boy? But I suppose if that is how you like to celebrate the day, then buy him a book. I suppose if he is being gifted for Christ’s birthday, then he might as well read something, perhaps the Bible. WWJD? What would Jesus Do?

Sincerely,

Nano Nagle

 

Dear Nano,

It’s basically the end of the year, and I’m getting the same amount of Instagram likes as I was months ago! Why can’t I get any likes?

From,

Not-liked Lindsay

 

Dear Not-liked Lindsay,

“Instagram”?… Gram… Grandmother? Why doesn’t your grandmother like you? Child, if you complain this much to me, imagine the amount you complain to her! No wonder she doesn’t  like you. Here is my advice: take a few deep breaths and get it together,  then see if you get more “likes.” She is your grandmother, I’m sure she will show you some sympathy.

Love,

Nano

 

Dear Nano,

I feel like all I do in school is get random pictures Airdropped to me. Like I’m tired of seeing cats and ugly men. How do I make it stop?

From,

Airdropped Anne

 

Dear Airdropped Anne,

I don’t know much about “Airdrop,” but I presume it is something… dropping from the air. Now, back in my day, nothing fell from the sky. But, if ugly men and cats are falling in front of you, rather than focussing on how ugly or annoying they are, you should probably save them from dying. In regards to making it all stop, in my experience when things are falling from the sky I take out an umbrella and do my best to ignore it, so try that with the ugly men and hope they eventually turn into handsome ones.

Your nun friend,

Nano

 

Dear Nano,

I feel so fat after Thanksgiving, and now Christmas is coming. I’m going to be eating so much. Do you have any tips on how to stay in shape over the holidays?

Sincerely,

Dieting Diane

 

Dear Dieting Diane,

Well, this might be a revolutionary idea in modern America, but you could try using the word “no.” As in, “No, I will not eat the entire turkey,” or “No, I wouldn’t like an extra slice of pie, Aunt Gertrude.” Denial seems so 17th century, I know, but do you really want to end up with diabetes in your stocking? I thought not.   

Best of luck,

Nano

 

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